2018 was certainly kind to us!
But the team at Defacto Dentists are certainly looking forward to some time off before coming back for 2019. After our 2018 predictions post went down a treat, we decided that we’d get our thinking caps back on and make more predictions for the year ahead.
Here’s what we think will happen in 2019:
- Apple will launch a new iPhone that cries every time you drop it or take more than three steps away from it.
- Chris Evans is named in Queen’s Honours.
- Ed Sheeran discovers he is Prince Harry’s long lost brother.
- 2019 X-Factor is cancelled because Simon Cowell is in Rehab.
- Texas announce their plans to have a referendum for ‘Texit’ from the USA.
- Donald Trump opens a third golf course in the UK in Bognor Regis.
- The UK will leave Europe, Scotland will begin plans to leave the UK and the town of Falkirk declares a state of independence.
- Michelle Obama announces her intent to run for US Presidency.
- Australia will join the European Union so that they can continue in the Eurovision song contest.
- There will be no Theresa May. Nobody knows what’s happened. She just won’t be here.
- There will also be a heavy snowfall in April. All brits are unsurprised.
- Graham Norton begins a new career as a bin man since he can no longer rely on Eurovision paying his bills. Poor guy.
- The first UK Heatwave will happen in May and last 3 weeks. Temperatures are going to reach 40+ degrees.
- Ed Sheeran dies his hair black to begin his new ‘Gothic’ phase. He fully embraces this new lifestyle and decides to drop his fourth studio album that’s called ‘Love Songs for My Bad Witches’.
- BMW announce that they build their cars without indicators on purpose after years of speculation from all other car owners. Are we surprised? No we are not.
- Elon Musk declares that he is indeed bankrupt, but tells everyone not to worry as he is moving to Mars within the year.
- Stormzy falls from the stage at his headline slot at Glastonbury.
- An Astroid has a near miss with earth. Scientists and astrology experts didn’t see it coming.
- Wimbledon final will be cancelled due to a heatwave.
- Aubergines become really popular and sell out everywhere.
- Donald Trump is Impeached.
- Public places will introduce different lanes for walking speeds. Beep beep, get out of my way, Susan. I’ve got places to be and people to see.
- Jamie Oliver is dropped from the Tesco advertising campaigns after a drop in profits (unsurprisingly). Nobody likes a sugar thief, Jamie.
- The Yeti is finally caught and turns out to actually be a caveman.
- Illegal teeth whitening products cause mass tooth fallout.
- Major airport disruption at Heathrow due to strike action. Everyone loses the plot.
- Scotland will take a second vote on Independence.
- Scotland qualify for the 2020 Euros.
- The John Lewis Christmas advert will debut and be incredibly disappointing for the 3rd year in a row.
- The Queen and Prince Phillip Die in the Same Month.
- Justin Bieber & Hailey Baldwin will file for divorce after just 1 year of marriage.
- Brits purchase the highest number of Brussel Sprouts since 1983.
So there you have it, those are our team’s predictions for the year ahead. Whatever you’ve planned for 2019, we hope it’s a fantastic year for you all! We’d love to know some of your predictions for the year – let us know what you think is going to happen in the comments!